Post No. 39

It's my birthday today. and I am turning 20 this year. a big leap.19 to 20.

Birthdays are important to me no matter what most people around tells me.
'it's only birthdays, you'll have it every year, no big deal.'
It might be just another day to you, its a big day for me.
and for the record. please DO NOT say that line to me ever again.


It's a day where it's all about the birthday boy/girl. its a day where you get all the attention (most of it anyway). its a day when people you haven't spoke to for three million years speaks to you. it's a day where you'll see who are the ones that really cared and loved you. its a day for many wonderful things.

birthdays. you wait 364 days just for that one day. that one day when it is all about you.

I cared a lot for birthdays. If I love you enough I'll waste all my thoughts on you just to give you the best. I'll make an effort.

I get disappointed a lot I admit. I have the wildest imaginations and the highest expectation. often to find myself dreaming for the impossible. often to find myself dropped to ground zero. often asking myself why am I emo-ing when I can still still make the best of it, by myself.

A lot of people say that I need to learn. learn to be humble. learn to not make a big deal out of things. learn to give but not expecting a return.
I don't expect. I anticipate. I wish. I hope. there will be a return.